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| Where she belongs | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jul 4 2008, 03:47 PM (336 Views) | |
| Deleted User | Jul 4 2008, 03:47 PM Post #1 |
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It was raining the day she returned; she saw this as fitting and perhaps a little precognitive; as if her world knew she was returning to it. She spun around her dorm room, deliriously happy, she picked up Fox and hugged him tight before really processing who she was hugging. She pulled him away from her. "Wait. How are you even here?" If animals could smile wryly she would have sworn that was what Fox did now. "I am a part of you, where you go I go. No matter the world." "Ah. Well, love to chat about your existence but there is someone I really need to see." She didn't bother changing, she had no idea how much time had passed, no idea of the weather beyond the fact that it was raining. Her tiny cotton dress would likely fall victim to the rain quickly but that was so far from her mind at the moment. She had to see Brian. She'd disappeared without a trace or a word; she recalled what it was like for her when he'd left her with nothing but a note. On top of that so many had already left him, their images immortalized in stone, she didn't want to be another statue to grace his hall. She never wanted him to think that she would leave him, but what other choice did he have? She ran though the campus, through the woods, tripping now and again. Her white dress was sopping and stained, her black hair was matted. Something Raine had noticed as she ran was that she was still human, whatever that place had done to her it had stuck. She was human again and Fox was still with her. What would Brian think of that? What was he thinking at that moment? What was he doing? Had he been beating himself up since she'd gone missing? She was sure that he'd fallen into the darkest recesses of his heart; her Brian always thought too much and always took too much in. She promised to stay, tried to help shoulder some of that hurt he was carrying around. And suddenly there it was. That little piece of comfort cut into a mountain face. She was suddenly terribly nervous. The first thing she noticed was the statue, not of her but of another young girl. Nothing about that could be good. Who was this woman? What had she been to Brian? And what on Earth had happened for her to end up in the ‘Hall of the Lost’ as Raine privately thought of Brian’s collection of statues. Had she died? Or, like Suzuki, had she just removed herself from his life? Her excitement was quickly turning to worry. Turning quicker still as she stepped though the front door to see a bloodied sword sitting casually in the foyer. “Brian!” She hadn’t meant to sound panicked. She had wanted to sound happy and thrilled and instead her worry over him won out causing her voice to come out more high and nervous than she'd intended. |
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| Deleted User | Jul 5 2008, 11:13 AM Post #2 |
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Resilient, it was the word Brian often thought of when he thought to explain how he survived though so many trials of life that made him want to die so many times over. It wasn’t just that his body was resilient, it was the insurmountable punishment his heart could take and keep ticking. Agonizing as it was, like his blood was nothing more than an acid coursing though his open heart he continued to live. Every day it was an excuse to go on just at little longer, maybe today would be the day that he made a break though. Maybe today was the day that he’d no longer have to run to Center just to find a bit of peace. Summer rain, it had a innate sadness to it, the lost day of summer fun. The lost day to do all the things that living in the sunlight would allow. Brian decided from the moment he opened his door that instead of sword training today, he’d get back to basics. His hands a bloody mess, with cuts and scrapes were too numb to disagree. So his bloody sword was left at his doorstep as he went deep into his home, the cleaned room the dojo where all his imaginary battles took place. Shutting himself in, Brian brought out his inner demons, these mental images, held nothing to the scars before him. As he stretched out though his routine, his breath deep and controlled his hands stretched out before him. He couldn’t help but look, they were scabbed everywhere, it looked like his hand had been ripped open then roughly tied back together. Hard to look at as he tried to refocus on his energies, the exercise became more difficult as his foot shifted forward, just about to start his routine. He tried to close his hands into balled fists, and the pain was immense. He bared his teeth at his hands, demanding they listen and ignore the pain. That was all he could do, ignore the pain, bury it deep enough where it would never get in the way. He could shift the earth around his feet, so he should be able to shift his own emotions as the need arises. He had to lock away what he felt, and for that he’d suffer any pain to accomplish it. Another deep breath he’d just layered enough on top to get started, His foot step forward and his hand curled though the pain in order to deliver a blow when Raine’s voice cut though it all like a knife. His body shifted and followed straight though the punch, overcompensating and launching himself for the matted floor. His eyes scanning the open door to the hallway, searching to see if Raine had suddenly appeared though doubt was flooding him as he’d seen her before. Falsely this visions came every time, his mind simply carried off that he wanted to see her whole again. Instead of rushing to his feet he rose slowly, and stepped out of the gym into the central hall. Clearing the doorway he was greeted with a wet sight of girl and familiar. A raven haired beauty that held Raine’s face and figure. Brian kept walking towards her descending the short staircase, till they were standing across from each other. If this was his Raine, she was changed again, she looked much more like the human girl he’d fished out of the waterfalls. Brian didn’t rush to hold her, nor made any movements that would sway what he was thinking at the moment. He wanted her… to say something. “Say something…” |
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| Deleted User | Jul 6 2008, 10:09 AM Post #3 |
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OOC: sorry this is short ^__^ She stared for a moment at him. Taking him in. His hands were a mess and she thought to ask about them but her voice was suddenly frozen. This was not the reaction she'd expected, truth be told she had expected something clichéd, she'd expected him to run to her, gather her in his arms and tell her to never leave again. There was suddenly an awkwardness in the room as they stood on either ends of it. The only sound besides their uneven breathing was the drip drip drip of the water off her dress. "I'm sorry." She wasn't sure what she'd been planning to say but she hadn't thought to apologize until that moment when he appeared before her. She took a tentative step towards him. "God, look at your hands, Bri..." She trailed off with the old nickname, she was so unsure now of what to say. So unsure of what he'd gone through while she was gone. She longed to hold him, to feel the familiar texture of his fur beneath her hands; the feel of it against her skin. But the ball was in his court and she waited until he had reached whatever conclusion he was hoping to reach. She didn't really like this quiet timid side of her but right now he was looking so much like a skittish creature, like he might run away if she approached too quickly that she thought it best to contain herself. Wait for him. |
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| Deleted User | Jul 6 2008, 11:51 AM Post #4 |
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Staring at her like she was an intruder, after all the time he’d cried for her in anguish. The sleepless nights and the terrible days, it all had made him tougher. Though perhaps more appropriate was it had steeled him into the concept of being alone all over again. He had managed to round up a box of her things and put it away. Just that morning, the reminders had been far too troubling for him to just leave be. Yet now like a angry ghost she was here standing him down, and he couldn’t have been happier for it. Though that may have been his problem in the first place, he was so happy yet he couldn’t just believe it. He wanted to with every electrical pulse that shot round his heart, and at the same time, the results of happiness lost were felt though out his body. Depriving and beating his body with; barely any food, restless night after restless night, intense painful training, subjecting himself to losses both great and small. He was dancing on the razors edge of exhaustion and only he truly knew it. For all her changes, she was still the same girl, a bit older perhaps, humans aged far less physically than chimeras did. He’d only had enough time to just become familiar with that chimeric body before she disappeared. Part of him was attached to that, and yet his heart beat with the demands of it’s warm bed waiting just across the room. The place where he felt the most safe and secure was holding her tight. He stepped forward without yet hearing her say a word, perhaps hearing some kind of explanation wasn’t as important as he had thought it would be. Maybe this time, it didn’t matter that she had just disappeared leaving him without a way in the world to know if she was alive or dead. Foot leaving the stone floor as he heard her apologize, Brian looked up then, if only for Raine he’d let her see everything his eyes could show with the intense feeling of hopelessness as she apologized for being gone. Why did she apologize? Did she intentionally leave? Brian winced as he gripped his hands and tried to force away the flooding thoughts of all the reasons why Raine would leave. Several dozen played all over again, the most vivid being those nights he had left her alone, again and again, she had never asked him why, his arrogance… said she didn’t know. He took another step forward ignoring both the barb of her concern and the pet name she had begun calling him, her accent thick on that name, like it had been made part of hers. “Why did you leave?” He looked at her and the blue of his eyes shimmered in the faint light from the crystalline lights. His eyes, a sense of great power was laid bare and unguarded, revealing all of that deep protected soul though them. He wanted to know this more than anything else, why leave him, when he would have done anything for her if she had but asked. He tore his gaze away from her eyes and trailed down towards the floor, stopping only once. The ring he had given her, what a fight that had become, all because he had wanted her closer. Somewhere closer means to him somewhere safer together than endangered apart. Yet that ring he’d given her was something that should have guaranteed happiness, serendipity was not something to be denied. Good fortune was to be celebrated, but did that mean that Raine’s serendipity was meant to be without him? Without any part of him? Her changed appearance, perhaps… she was better off now… “I don’t know how long I could wait not knowing…” |
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| Deleted User | Jul 7 2008, 04:51 PM Post #5 |
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Why did you leave? He asked like it was something she had chosen to do. A conscious decision on her part to leave. But then he had no idea that it hadn't been. "I have a new power, it would seem." She thought this was the best way to start. "I can uh... travel. Through mirrors. I had a lovely chat with a disembodied voice, some sort of conglomerate of the all the seers long past and ended up trapped in a world that was not this world. There were fairies, an evil queen, talking mazes. Even got myself a familiar. This is Fox, by the way." She didn't want to sound flippant, and yet she could not help it. It was an attitude that she had developed in Wonderland, a coping mechanism. That and Fox made it shockingly easy to be flippant. Perhaps it was his fault, this new attitude of hers was something she'd picked up from him. She didn't want to get into the happings of that world, she had left that behind her and now she was back. She wanted to forget it all and just be with Brian again. They had hardly begun their new life together and she had to go and get herself lost in a pocket of space-time. Or where ever or whatever that place was. "Got myself a makeover too." She did a little spin, but seeing how nervous she was now the spin came off a little more wobbly then it would have otherwise. She hoped he wouldn't notice, after all she had never been the most graceful, she had fallen into a lake on their first date after all. "Seems that place didn't much like what Lilith had done. Apparently Fox is created from the energy, or Chimera pieces or something. Not really clear on how that works." She was babbling, talking way too fast, tripping over her words. "I'd never knowingly leave you. You have to know that. Never." |
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| Deleted User | Jul 8 2008, 12:42 PM Post #6 |
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Brian tried in vain to swallow everything that had just been said. It was a different feeling to not being the one who said all these incredibly unbelievable things. He knew all too well that at any moment in time he could develop a new power that could have him pushing spikes out of his skin or suddenly his body would be paper thin, or crazy things of that nature. It was simply how his life was and how he lived it. Yet now he had to witness this kind of radical change in someone else. It seemed all the worse medicine to take as Raine seemed completely unphased by it. The woman he had taken into his home didn’t look or sound anything like she had before. Though he was sure it was still her deep down, he was having trouble syncing up that image to the woman who twirled before him. Her matted raven hair, unblemished skin, soaked to the bone in her cotton dress. He felt lost, in a world that he had known so well. She had two months apparently to get used to her new form, while he had been longing to see his fox girl. Apart of him felt sad that she was gone, sure the changes were only skin deep, yet her being a chimera had given him a sense of connection. Like they belonged together and not a soul could question it, Designed for each other, yet now Brian felt somewhat like they were starting over. Her encouraging words, felt distantly bothersome, she wouldn’t knowingly leave him, but what if she was meant to leave him? Brian didn’t say a word; he stepped back and walked into the bathroom. He was still every bit as much in love with her as he was before. Yet everything felt so weird, stability he had known was gone, things that were a certain way weren’t. As he grabbed up a towel he wasn’t even sure if he could touch her, it swirled too many questions in his mind. What did it mean that these seers rejected what Lilith had done? Did it mean that he wasn’t good for her? Was this all because of the ring that he’d given her? Had it decided that Raine belonged with these seers and needed to grow? He stared at himself in the mirror, held up the towel he had grabbed and forced himself to move on. Brian walked back and held out a towel for Raine. He’d beaten himself down from the excitement he should feel that Raine came back, to a deep burrowing worry that this was only temporary. There was nothing assured between them and Brian realized he’d been just as unfair to her, but neither of them choose to be this way. Brian could hope, she and he could overcome those challenges right? Brian’s eyes trembled for all the hurt he had inflicted on himself. From the scabby hands, to the blackened soul that always trembled, his fears ruled him and he moved quickly wrapping his arms around Raine and crying for all he was worth. The towel was smashed between them as he was bent down holding his face in her black hair. “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry that I doubted you. I didn’t know what to do. I still don’t know everything is so different. The world keeps changing, I can’t keep up. Raine….” He broke down into muttered mumbles about all the things that had bothered him since she had been gone. The rapid decline of so many things he’d prided himself on, the zombie kind of life he’d lead, the famine and hunger he’d inflicted the loss of so many things. |
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| Deleted User | Jul 9 2008, 12:18 PM Post #7 |
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She watched him process; then watched as he walked away from her. A cold dread set in even though he'd only walked as far as the bathroom. And then was back holding out a towel and then holding her before she could even take the offered object. “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry that I doubted you. I didn’t know what to do. I still don’t know everything is so different. The world keeps changing, I can’t keep up. Raine….” She hadn't been aware of just how badly she'd missed his arms around until they were around her again. She nearly sighed with the completeness that she felt. When she had first met Brian he had been slow to trust, slow to act. So afraid of what they could mean to each other that it seemed easier for him to do nothing, at least this was how she saw it. Once she made it clear to him, however, that she was there to stay and the best possible thing he could do was hold her tight and never let go things started to move quickly between. This now seemed like a step back, a step beyond even. The man that clung to her was so much more broken then she'd even seen him. And it was her fault. How did that quote go: it was better to have loved and lost to have never loved at all? In this case she wasn't so sure. Maybe things would hve been better for Brian having never met her. Sure he'd still be stuck in his slightly anti-social hermit type ways but certainly that was better than the tortured soul before her now. "This is all my fault." Her voice had a hollow ring to it. For the first time since they'd come there Fox made his presence known, butting his head lightly against her leg. "You'll have to forgive her." Fox said in that calm quiet voice of his as he jumped up on the shoulder than Brian wasn't resting on. "I believe she's having what she would so eloquently call a 'brain meltdown". I think all this has been a little too much for out Raine." His voice snapped her out of her revere but did not remove the thought from her head. "No really, it's all my fault. If I'd never left... better yet if we'd never met then you wouldn't be hurting like this." It killed her to see him hurt. The old Raine would have said something along the lines of sticking out through the pain makes you stronger but the old Raine had never had someone she loved fall so to pieces before. Love changes a person, she used to think for the better, but what his love for her had done to Brian was anything but good. And yet the worst part of it all, despite the fact that she knew she was causing him pain and that maybe he was better off having never known her, now that she was here she couldn't leave. Maybe things would have been easier had they never met, never got involved but the fact was that they had and she knew that she couldn't put a stop to it now. It would be like tearing out a piece of her soul. She gave herself a moment of reflection, just one, and then pulled herself together. "No, you know what. I don't care that it hurts, its better than feeling nothing and had I not met you that's all I would have felt. And had you not met me..." she trailed off, hoping for him to fill in the blanks. Had he not met her, what? How would he end that sentence? |
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| Deleted User | Jul 10 2008, 01:23 PM Post #8 |
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He poured out everything, all the torment, torture, and terror that had built up over the past two months. Evaporating from his heart as his eyes balled out into the raven haired beauty he was clinging to. It was like a much needed cleaning for his soul that had become so lost and terrified with her absence, as he simply remained there holding her. He no longer felt like he could move, his body paralyzed unwilling or unable to remove himself from Raine’s wet form. So cathartic to finally let everything he’d been unwilling to admit, to know that Raine wasn’t gone from his life forever for sure now. Rather than to accept her disappearance, he had bottled all of that up, and let it fester. It festered till it became a poison, eating away at him leaving behind only a sickly shell. He nuzzled his eyes on her shoulder, so utterly defeated by her return, he felt completely drained. He couldn’t speak anymore once he’d run out of the bottle of worries that he just stood there bent down on her shoulder. His head lay on her shoulder buried on its side on her neck as he listened to her breathing. Together again, and at the same time Brian suddenly heard her voice, say new pained words. Brian wanted to rise tell her she was talking nonsense but the freezing feeling remained, he wanted too much to remain close with her, too much pain had traveled though his voice to be used so quickly. Too much had been realized for his body to yet wake up and restore the losses. Perhaps it was fox’s leap that set the balance of her shoulders off, or the idea that Raine was now overwhelmed. Brian forced himself up, to look directly into Raine’s eyes as she said some of the most hurtful things she had ever told him. Even if she was thinking of his benefit the thought of his world without Raine was a terrifying place. Brian knew the path he was walking just before he met Raine, the power he was building at the time, and then the spur to finish things with Lilith. He knew Lilith had him on the road to a swift and early death, and Raine had sacrificed everything to bring him back. What could convey that… then she started, her life… had felt nothing? Brian couldn’t believe such a woman felt nothing before the way she made him feel. She couldn’t have just been drifting along in a sea of nothing… if he hadn’t met her… she paused. Brian’s track of tears down his face seemed to start again, as he smiled at her, brushing his red furred hand across her cheek though her hair before resting along her jaw line tiling her head ever so slightly up if she’d permit it. Still the blue of his eyes seemed wider, simmering from the constant tears that he’d swore he had run out of. “If I hadn’t met you, the world would have ended.” He smiled, his world certainly would have ended, and his life would be dust in the wind. Perhaps he would have kept fighting AHS kept growing stronger and done like Ryu, destroyed the campus and as much carnage like a monster. Like the Mors spirit that was his soul, yet Brian was tempered, and he belonged to Raine. “I love you, and…” Brian didn’t know what to say, he simply leaned down, ignoring fox’s closeness to the event and pressed his lips to hers. The salty tears that had dripped down his face mixed with the summer rain that had covered Raine. As he kissed her he was gentle and tender, his weakened state seemed inclined to be gentle rather than get consumed in passion. |
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| Deleted User | Jul 13 2008, 09:27 PM Post #9 |
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She was struck by a thought rather lightening like that he'd never kissed her quite like this before. And neither had she kissed him in such a fashion either. They had been so afraid in the beginning; he of rushing her and she of nightmares she had forgotten to fear that kisses had turn into passionate affairs. Stolen and broken rather quickly, leaving them both breathless and searching for something else to distract them from feelings they felt they could not act upon. This kiss was tender, at times their lips barely met content to brush and feel the others breathe against them. For a moment she stood there not moving a muscle, her lips micro millimeters from his. She stood there breathing, taking it all in. Her hand reached up to clasp the wrist of the hand that rested on her cheek. Not to remove it but because at the moment her brain could think of nothing better to do with it. Fox had discretely leapt from her shoulder and decided that he was better off elsewhere. It was strange how much this kiss moved her. A strangled sob tore from her throat. It wasn't a sound of misery, though perhaps it could be construed that way. Her mind no longer had words for the emotions tearing through her; the sob was some sort of attempt of a fevered mind to portray something akin to frustration or extreme delight. Her other hand, the one not still gripping his wrist reached up to grip his hair at the base of his neck. She nipped at his bottom lip and another little whimper escaped. "God, people weren't meant to feel this much were they?" Her lips hadn't moved far from his, she'd moved her head slightly sideways to speak; the words were said basically into the side of his mouth. And with that she turned them about and pushed him up against the door, a small satisfied smile graced her lips. "I've always wanted to do that." And then her lips were on his again, firmer this time, a bit more demanding but the lazy gentle aspect still remained, but it was a more through exploration. It was as though she had to burn the shape, taste and feel of his lips into her soul. |
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| Deleted User | Jul 15 2008, 12:21 PM Post #10 |
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His lips gracing hers so tenderly, his heart beating in a joyous song as they touched, it was all that mattered in the world now. They stood together after that blissful kiss, with nothing between them but their breath mingling as they exhaled and inhaled that sweet mix of scents. So happy, to have her in his hands again, so content to stand wherever she wanted him. Her sob almost seemed like it was contrary to everything that dances across their faces and fluttered in their hearts. Brian saw though it, she was feeling as he did, the tears were from and overwhelming need for their bodies trying to express their hearts. So overwhelming that it could only be matched by the sorrow they felt when divided so utterly. There was some concern in his eyes as he watched her so carefully; absorbing everything about the girl he loved. She grasped his wrist, as a guide, watching the expressions of joy come across her face. She moved forward and nipped at his bottom lip. The gentle pain stirred something ignored within him, his lips were hers, and he wrapped his arm around her lower back pulling her ever closer to him as their bodies touched. She turned in his grasp, speaking to his mouth as if they should have been his words. "God, people weren't meant to feel this much were they?" “But we are.” Brian’s voice was a whisper of truth, though all the pain and suffering they both have had to endure. The question lingering over their heads if the person they loved most in the world would be gone forever, the risks they both took for a world that would so often try to be rid of them. Their love tempered by great risk, and personal destiny, it made a strong recipe. Perhaps this recipe was for the strongest emotions to be taken out of their hearts, amplified a hundred times over as he saw her body move within his grasp. He was surprised, yet it felt good for her to press him so, her clothes still drenched and clinging to her every curve. Fluidly pressing against him, as she kissed him with a lazy fever, his lips pressed, then dipped inside of hers rolling on nibbles and love bites. His hand moved from her cheek and slipped along her neck, brushing his fur against her sensitive skin, eliciting rises out of her as he caught his hand on the right strap of her dress. He pushed on, moving the strap over her shoulder. As his hand rounded her back teasing her flesh as he moved. “I love you, and I always will. No matter what happens, I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” Brian smiled after breaking that kiss to tell her finally what he’d always wanted to tell her, and he felt the fire tracing from his fingers as he moved along her body. She was a black haired maiden in his home, it wasn’t fear now that held them apart, and they’d crossed all borders of their relationship a long time ago. Raine’s leaving only had left him with wants, and needs, as her companion, and as her lover. |
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