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Mr. Mayor teaches us!; Closedish.
Topic Started: Apr 27 2009, 01:30 AM (207 Views)
Mr. Trout
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Henshin boogy
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
"And here is your mail for today." The assistant, the one extremely competent one that always crunched the numbers. The one who Eeth declared one day he would actually be able to remember the name of, tossed a particularly nasty pile of letters onto his desk. There were a few rubber bands and Eeth, in his angry stupor reached for a mug of coffee on his desk, taking it up and drinking it down, only to stick out his tongue and pull back disgusted at the contents.

"Ugh, this is the worst whiskey I've ever had!" A lame joke, but he honestly believed it was alcohol.

"Your wife had me switch the mugs on you. Something about a promise to cut back?" The assistant's hands went to her hips as she glared at him. Sheesh, the man couldn't even get a break at work! Always with the no smokey smokey, no sexy sexy, no drinky drinky! Bah! It was like he was five! Or seventy three! For some reason those two ages seemed to get the same reaction from everyone.

"Come on, I'm not that bad!"

"There is a firm, and very distinct line between responsible critique and drunken rage. We're still paying off the psych bills on the last reporter you gave an interview to." The woman grumbled beneath her breath some rather nasty obscenities, most of them involved how he seemed to lose his pants in most any serious situation. Sometimes she wondered about his mental health.

"Fine fine. What do we have today?" His coffee mug found it's place back on his desk as he started flipping through the mail. "Bill, bill, paternity suit, bill bill, paternity suit, paternity suit, paternity suit, pa-think I see a pattern here. Death threat, invite to join some new super group, invite to join the church of Zeus, Thor needs virgins, bill bill, death threat, death threat-"

The assistant stomped his hand as the man prepared to chuck the majority of it into the trash. She expertly picked it up and flipped through it. Holding up a particularly nasty letter, opening it with a finger nail and read it. "Death threat." She managed, seeming to pull out surprise in her voice.

"Eh? So? Get at least two dozen of those a week. Usually from furries. They don't get a voice till they wear pants!" Okay, besides the hypocrisy of that statement, it was still a wonder of deduction.

"This one is in the form of a petition." The assistant flipped it over, to show over two hundred signatures. The mayor took a look and shrugged. Okay, he had not seen such a thing before, but really how far away from reality was something like that? It would only have been a matter of time. The woman rolled up the item under her arm and nodded. "I'll take care of this one."

However as she left, the real meat of this story started. The death threat shot from her hand, circling around the desk. Out of the wastebasket and off the ground came other letters, unfolding and opening. Bills and paternity suits, adverts for whores and strange religions formed together. They became a whirlwind of hate! Bad news incarnate! Along with newspapers at least. They burst out the window of the mayor's office, sending glass shattering in all directions. The man stared blankly as they swirled onto the ground outside the office steps near the square. They had become a large humanoid shape. A demon, which Eeth dangerously dubbed.

"Billtronic! It's back." He was actually not that enthusiastic, but it seemed more dramatic. And as such, the man had to action pose, rising up to his desk and raising one finger into the air, either to declare himself a paragon of masculinity or the man who walks the path to heaven. Each one was equally ludicrous. He did however kick the coffee mug into the pot of a tree decorating his office. "Enough of this swill! Bring me booze! Sixteen drinks! And thirty seven nude pictures of queen Victoria!" He jumped onto the window sill, his assistant aghast, she had seen more then her fair share, but this was just silly.

"Don't question me! Political utensils! I get a tax write-off and everything."
Edited by Mr. Trout, Apr 27 2009, 01:30 AM.
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